中英双语 | 女汉纸不需要男人的11个理由

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Here are the 11 reasons a woman can do perfectly well without a man. Whether you're married or single, they're sure to strike a chord.
以下就是女人没有男人也可以棒棒哒的11个理由。不论你是结婚了还是单身狗,它们都一定会引起你的共鸣。

1. The TV remote control is a device that changes channels — it is not a life-support system. I do not need a man who thinks it is and has to have it prised out of his hands.
电视遥控器是用来换频道的设备——它不是个生命维持系统!我不需要一个这样想的男人,还总是把遥控器攥在手里紧紧不放!

2. I like my bathroom sink to be sparkly and clean. I do not need a man to leave foamy bristles all over it.
我就是喜欢亮闪闪的干净的浴室。我不需要男人把沾满泡沫的胡须毛发掉一地。

3. I can cook a meal without using every pot and pan in the kitchen. I don't need a man to turn it into a bombsite.
我用不着用上厨房里的所有盆和所有锅来做一顿饭!我不需要个男人把厨房变成爆炸屋!

4. I don't need a man to come home and spend two hours telling me about his day without once asking me about mine.
我不需要一个男人踏进家门就喋喋不休两个小时,告诉我他的一天如何如何,却一次也没问过我!

5. Laundry needs to be done on different wash cycles. I don't need a man to ruin my cashmere by not reading the labels.
洗衣服需要用不同的洗涤圈数(指洗衣机功能)。我不需要一个男人看也不看标签就把我的羊毛衫洗坏了!

6. When I can't do a DIY job, I admit it. I don't need a man to insist he can, then mess it up.
当我不会自己动手的时候,我就说我不会做。我不需要一个男人坚持说“我会我会!”……然后弄的一团糟。

中英双语 | 女汉纸不需要男人的11个理由

7. When I can't open a tight jar, I stab the lid, release the pressure — and hey presto. No man required.
当我打不开密封罐头的时候,我把盖子刺个洞,释放压力——你看,变!根本不需要男人嘛。

8. When my clothes feel tight, I know I've gained weight. I don't need a man to point it out, grab rolls or tell me I'm 'so cuddly'.
当我的衣服变紧的时候,我知道我重了!我不需要一个男人为我指出,夺走我的面包卷,或是告诉我是那么的“惹人想抱”!

9. Sometimes it's nice to watch a cheesy, romantic movie at the cinema. I don't need a man to sit next to me, sighing, tutting and muttering 'for God's sake' all the way through.
有时候在电影院看看恶俗的爱情片挺好的。我不需要一个男人坐在我身边,全程叹气,发出啧啧的不满,还有发着“天哪”的牢骚。

10. Making a list and sticking to it is the fastest, most efficient way to get around a supermarket. I don't need a man to return home having bought nothing we need and 200 things we don't.
列一个清单,按单子购买是最快的、最高效的超市购物方案。我不需要一个男人回家的时候给我买了一堆不需要的东西,而我们的必需品什么都没买!

11. They're your family. I don't need a man who needs me to remember the birthdays of his parents, siblings, and nieces and to buy their Christmas presents.
他们是你的家人。我不需要一个男人要我记住他爹娘还有兄弟姐妹还有外甥们的生日,还要买圣诞礼物给他们!

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