Wednesday, 9 February 2011

5 Deadly Habits of jono

Sean Bean at the Empire Film Awards in March 2009.Image via WikipediaLast year, jono asked me ever so kindly if I'd like to contribute a guest post to this lovely space. Months into the new year, I finally get my ass into gear to finally begin to write something. Damn, this should be easy, I think. I'll just write anything like I always do. Except, this isn't my space. You're not here to read my blog. You're hear to be amused and entertained by some geeky finding found by your favourite geek... Ummm, do you hear the birds chirping yet? Wow, those lights seem awfully bright. Ahem, ahem.

Okay, here's the truth - there's no way I can amuse/entertain the way jono can, but perhaps I can shed some light on the man behind the blog. Here's what I've discovered about your entertainer...

5 deadly habits of jono

1) jono is way too trusting
He says write anything. Freedom of speech. Anything goes. (Ahh, jono, please. Never ever trust a shit disturbing Canadian free reign to write whatever she wants. You're simply tempting the devil. And while you're at it, I'm in dire, dire need, have lost everything, and need some money. Can you send me some money via paypal so I can pay my rent?)

2) jono is a geeks' geek
Not just any random geek, but even the geeks think he's a geek. He claims to be a security specialist, but I think he's more like Salander with high tech gadgets able to solve real mysteries from within the confines of a hospital bed recovering from a gunshot wound to the head. He even wears superhero costumes. Superman, Spiderman, even Wonder Woman.

3) jono never sleeps
He only dreams of sleeping, but instead stays up late every night being a geek researching and planning his next post(s). Or he's watching some inappropriate videos. But more likely, he's researching and planning his next post(s). He spends ridiculous amounts of time planning, and organizing so that he delivers on quality posts for you, his readers. He usually has multiple posts ready to go. Should he kick the proverbial bucket, I'm sure his posts will continue to be posted for months on end. Perhaps even years.

4) jono speaks in parseltongue
jono speaks multiple languages including english, french, spanish, irish, and even sign language (BSL). What he doesn't tell you is that in these 5 languages, he's continues talking about something geeky so it may as well be parseltongue to non-geeks. However, with an accent like his, he could be reading a legal contract, and still sound like Hugh Grant. jono hates Hugh Grant. jono also hates Sean Bean. jono loves hobbits though. He wants to smoke weed, climb Mt Doom and have Frodo on his back.

5) jono steals great lines
jono steals and also writes the best facebook status lines. He pretends to be goody-two-shoes on his blog, but you should be friends with him on facebook to get more of the real deal. The really funny deal. That's where warped jono lives. I find warped jono absolutely hilarious, but if you want safe jono - he's entertaining too.
I hope you've found out something new about the man behind the blog. Keep reading, and don't let jono's 5 deadly habits scare you away.

- Daisy, from
P.S. Just in case you're unsure, I made up stuff.
P.P.S. Thanks jono for giving me this opportunity. I hope we're still friends. :)
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